After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I want to have your abortion
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
