Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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