As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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