singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
