I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
my shit smells like andre
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
