stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
