I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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