I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Randomize
