still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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