I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
