I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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