are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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