Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
