I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize