he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize