I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
