the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
