I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
