is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
