I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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