ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You smell like stripper and shame
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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