So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize