My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize