It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
