you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
