i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize