It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Randomize
