Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
This house was built for laser tag.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Randomize
