you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize