I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
