i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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