Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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