My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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