smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
