do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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