I am puke
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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