if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Fuck appropriateness.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
