Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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