We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Can you bring me the toilet please
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
