No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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