you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
