I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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