he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
