My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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