just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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