he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
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