I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
it was like eating out sand paper
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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