Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
