Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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