I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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