: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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