She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
