Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
